Still half awaken, I checked the time of the clock next to my bed, it was around 5.30 in the morning. Suspecting it could be a crank call at such early wee hours, i decided to ignore it. Should there is an emergency call and it is related to work, my Nokia phone will sure ring again. So, I decide to go back to sleep. Somehow consciously, I also turned on my Sony Ericsson phone next to my bed; just in case if the emergency call is made by my family members.
Just seconds before i dose off, my Sony Ericsson phone rang. I quickly picked up the call when i saw the caller ID was my younger brother. With a sober voice, he told me that my grandma has passed away in the morning and I can hear faintly the sound of my mom's crying sadly at the background.
My granny died at the age of 86. She was first suspected to suffer from cancer in November 08 and had admitted to the hospital twice for pneumonia since. She died on the 3rd day after she was discharged from the hospital for her second pneumonia case.
According to the nurse in the nursing home, my grandma had died peacefully in bed. I confirmed her saying when i saw my granny in her coffin. She looked very peaceful and calm; showed no sign of final struggle from pain. She just looked as if she was in deep sleep and even had a faint smile on her face. I am pleased that she is finally free from human sufferings and attained peace.
It is uncommon for the Chinese to take photographs of funerals, I decided to go against the norm and document the event anyhow. Of course, my action has attracted some whispers from the crowd but I had my own reasons. I am a strong believer that we all should not live life to please others but to ourselves, as long as we are not hurting others.
To me, these final images are the least I can do to offer to our family members, especially those who are living abroad of some memories of the final stage of grandma's existence on earth.
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There are many different funeral rituals for the Chinese. Since granny is a Buddhist, we fulfilled her wish to follow the Buddhist way - which is very simple, calming, peaceful and no crying Drama! (unlike the Taoism way)
Burning incense as a sign of paying respect to our deceased granny.
Neighbours, relatives and family friends from near and afar gathered on the eve of the cremation to offer condolences and paying respects to the deceased. In Chinese, we called this ritual [ 坐夜], literally translated as "sitting through the night". In older days, the next of kins of the deceased have to take turns to accompany the death throughout the night. In these days of modern age, we are more practical, we sleep after calling a night off.
In line with Buddhism philosophy, only vegetarian foods were served. Omnivores and Carnivores were surely displeased :)
Sweet red bean soup with sago to sooth the sorrow hearts
The Chinese always prays and wishes for good health, wealth and longevity in life. Hence, although the official deceased age of my grandma was 86, we featured her Lunar age as 89 - additional 3 years (3 again is an auspicious number) as her age of death.
No offerings of animal origin are allowed. Only fruits, flowers, rice, vegetarian dishes, burning incenses and candles (now replaced by electrical lights) are placed on the altar of the deceased.
A view of grandma's altar behind the steel bars of the house's window.
Granny's final resting place is at the Garden of Remembrance - a memorial park. The memorial park has a website http://paradise-remembrance.com/ check it out if you wish.
Last praying ritual in the house before departing to the crematorium.
Close family members and relatives paying their last respect and prayer to grandma.
Prayer from a daughter to her mom
We come from a big family, some relatives had to offer their prayers outside the house.
The tablet on the coffin will guide grandma's soul to her final resting place.
These people who were carrying the banners are volunteers from the Buddhist monetary / society.
The Buddhist and Taoist Chinese uses chrysanthemum in many form of prayers, whether in paying respects to the gods and deities and in funerals.
Unlike cemetery of the older days, the Garden of Remembrance is really a beautiful, clean and quite memorial park. Its surroundings is so well taken care off than most residential areas of the livings. Of course, the death don't litter and pollute!
Arriving at the crematorium. The location of my granny's final resting place is really out of the town. It was already late in the morning and almost noon when we reached there.
Placing incense on the coffin, and paying the last respect to grandma before the coffin entering into the furnace.
